


top of the world

by TheStarrySkiesOfPalaven



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: (of a sort i guess), Character Study, Gen, Invisible Kingdom | Revelation Route, POV Second Person, Trans Female Character, also advancing my trans!severa agenda, background feliciazura and flora/corrin; mentioned sumidelia and lucisev, rip to fates and it negating any development severa can receive in awakening but im different
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:13:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23519776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheStarrySkiesOfPalaven/pseuds/TheStarrySkiesOfPalaven
Summary: severa thinks about what she's denied herself for so long. azura listens.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	top of the world

**Author's Note:**

> was just thinking a lot about how, despite all the grief, trauma, and issues severa has associated with cordelia and being a pegasus knight, she can still become a pegasus knight and clearly loves her mom and wants to be like her at heart.
> 
> and then thought about sumidelia and how it'd be basically tripled in that family's case 😔😔😔😔 so here's something exploring severa's possible feelings on it all.

"Thank you, Stalwart Selena! Your aid to the upholders of justice shall not be forgotten!"

You wave Arthur off, hiding a fond smirk over his antics. "Yeah, yeah... get going, that staff isn't gonna get to Lady Elise by itself."

With a final salute, he leaves through the door as loudly as he entered, and you're left alone in the armory. You open the window to let in some fresh air, then get back to your duties for the day; you mark one fully-powered mending staff off of the inventory list, and start cataloguing this week's expenses again.

_Damaged weapons... swords to repair... three. Axes to repair... seven._

You roll your eyes. Arthur's horrible luck extends even to his weapons.

_Lances to repair... four._ _Rinkah needed a new club. Oboro needed a new whetstone for her naginata..._

As mind-numbingly boring as it is, it's still nice to get to do _something_ instead of nothing when you're not busy kicking some invisible puppets' teeth in; certainly better than taking care of the livestock, that's for sure.

(The mere thought of that one particularly vengeful goat makes you shudder.)

It takes a while for anything to interrupt your focus, but the door opens some time later, and Azura comes in carrying a crate of what looks like normal weapons and other miscellaneous items, more somber than usual. Your heart twinges, knowing the reason behind it.

"Hey, Azura... how's Felicia doing?"

Her sigh is heavier than the crate she's carrying. "She's... still reeling. Finding something like that out..."

You nod sympathetically. After Corrin found out, it took a very short amount of time for pretty much everyone to hear about the truth of poor Flora and Felicia's 'employment' in the Nohrian royal family. The shouting match she had with her older Nohrian siblings was _legendary_.

You haven't seen Lady Camilla, or Lord Xander for that matter, so cowed in... well, ever.

"And Flora? I haven't seen her since yesterday."

Azura sighs again as she puts the crate down. "She's with Corrin, of course... I don't think she's blaming herself any less today."

You two share a look of helpless commiseration.

After a few moments, she kneels down to retrieve some of the things in the crate. "Where do you want these?"

"Wait, you don't-- ugh, _fine_... put those on the second shelf over there," you say, and make a few notes in the inventory list. "... thanks."

"Of course."

The time passes in mostly comfortable silence, with you using your writing hand to sometimes pick up the smaller items yourself. Suddenly, your hand wraps around something warm, and you lift it up.

Hah. Of _course_ it's one of those.

You must've been quiet for a few moments longer than you thought, because Azura speaks up. "Is everything alright?"

"... yeah, just-- thinking about these little things," you say, turning the Heart Seal over in your hand. "Thinking about how I could've used one of these and their whole 'help you realize your true self' thing when I was a kid."

Azura gives a small smile at that. "Ah... can I ask how you _did_ find out?"

You snort. "My mom's pegasus, Aurora. Nosiest horse I've ever seen."

She tilts her head curiously. "A... pegasus?"

"I told you about how pegasi over where I'm from are really picky, right? Girls only and all that?"

"Ah! They can tell?"

"Oh, yeah... very much so. My mom once told me that at one point over half of her squadron were trans girls who were accepted by a pegasus when they were none the wiser; her and my mama included."

She giggles. "I'm guessing a lot of people come to the pegasi when they have doubts, don't they?"

"Mhm..."

Azura is silent for a bit more, then speaks again. "Is everything alright?"

You bite your lip. "Yeah, it's just... it's tempting me, but I don't want it."

"... are you scared of what it could show you?"

"Hm? Oh! No, it's..." you give yourself a bitter chuckle, shaking your head. "I know exactly what it'll show me, actually. But..."

She waits, her hand on your shoulder in silent comfort.

"Ever since I realized I was a girl all I could hear was questions about becoming a pegasus knight like my moms, and oh how _wonderful_ it was that I could carry on their legacy. And then, my little sister also decided to become one, and I was... I was a dumb kid who started rejecting everything associated with pegasi out of sheer desperation to not be just a shadow of her parents..."

You let out a long, long sigh. "I was... a dumb kid who loved her moms and wanted to be like them, but I was too young to not care about the expectations of strangers. And so..."

The sympathy she shows wants to make you curl up and hide. "I understand that... I really do."

"It took me a long time to accept how wrong I was for letting other people shape me and my life like that," you say, then huff. "Hah, I say that as if I hadn't only started coming to terms with it after we came here... but... I want them to see it, you know? I want to look my family in the eyes and say how much I love them before I let myself soar."

A few more moments pass before you shake yourself, and put the Heart Seal on the shelf. "... I have a reputation as a terrible, antisocial, rude idiot to maintain so I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell people I have actual _feelings_ ," you say with a feeble wink.

Azura lets out that melodic laugh of hers. "I think it may be a bit too late."

You chuckle. "Oh, well... I guess I can live with that. Thanks for... you know. Everything."

"Of course, Selena... anytime."

You let out another sigh. "Well... I got things from here; I'm sure your girlfriend needs you more than I," you say, gesturing at the rest of the unsorted items.

She blushes faintly, but smiles nonetheless. "I... if you're sure?"

You make shooing motions at her. "Go be with Felicia already! Dummy..."

She laughs one last time before she waves a farewell to you, and leaves throughout the armory door.

You sigh, feeling the familiar prickle of envy; you _really_ wish you were with Lucina right now, whispering late at night and cuddling, telling terrible jokes and making you wince with the newest fashion disaster she came up with...

... but this whole war against Anankos needs to finish before _that_ can happen.

And so, you start putting what remains of the items Azura brought to their places.

_One pouch of magically-infused crystal dust..._

_Three fairly serviceable iron swords..._

_An herb pouch; medicinal..._

You look at the last item remaining, and smile sardonically to yourself. As you grab the shaft of the ornate lance, a feeling of light-headed giddiness starts spreading throughout your body, and you can't resist giving it a twirl like you've seen your moms do probably _thousands_ of times.

The open window lets in a sudden breeze as you do so, and for a moment--just a fleeting moment--you think you know what Cyn meant when she described flying as the feeling of being on top of the world.

**Author's Note:**

> ylissean pegasi are trans allies and that's that!!!


End file.
